Wednesday, July 28, 2010

I ought to expect less of myself more often...

I woke up again this morning with Jerry at 5:15 am. I sat down with my cup of earl gray tea, and put my fingers to use. Not only did I meet my goal word count for the morning, but I exceeded it. I'm getting so enthusiastic about my writing again. I'm thinking about it all the time, when I'm doing house work, playing with my kids, even when I am trying to sleep. I had read about so many writers scheduling their time out and being stringent about it. I tried that, and failed. I've come to accept that if I schedule something, it's probably not going to happen. By not holding myself up to any expectations, I am happier and more productive. I wonder if I will have to trick myself for the rest of my life to get anything done.

The sun is bright already, and it's just 9 am. I am happy to see that the clouds have temporarily vacated. The grass is green and the sky is blue. Today is a good day. I think the kids and I will go for a walk when Ayslyn wakes up.

One last thought - I am finally OK with "process" and "layering". Before, I wanted to write a good, healthy chunk and have to do minimal editing. I thought that I would write too much, and then dissect, shaping my story into a beautiful work of art. It never occurred to me that I would first write the skeleton, then add the muscle, then a little padding, and some skin. Its an interesting process for me, and I'm certainly learning a lot about myself in the meantime.

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