Monday, April 11, 2011

Running circles in Theme Park

A lot of running, actually. So far, I'm sticking to it. I say that because I haven't solidly committed to be a runner. Because I have a tragic habit of not REALLY committing to something I have indeed claimed to commit to. You understand.

I ran 5 miles today in just under 55 minutes. That's not terribly fast, but it IS dang good for me, and totally set a new standard for myself. Today, for the first time, my lungs actually outlasted my legs. It was a major break through. I feel healthy, I feel pumped, I feel happy.

Around mile 3, I got to thinking about what inspires my running. A small, papery old man got onto the treadmill to my right. He was frail and slow. But he was THERE. With tubes hooked around his ears and into his nose, and his travel sized oxygen tank on the floor between our treamills, he panted next to me. A heavier set woman got onto the treadmill to my left, and began speed walking. She took a couple breaks. She sweated next to me, with me, and I wanted to tell her she was doing great. These people inspired me. I can't say that if I was old I would still exercise with that type of dedication. And I can't say that if I was heavier and more out of shape that I would be working at a healthier body. These two people embodied what I'm running from, and hopefully what I'm running towards.

What inspires you, and keeps you going when you feel like you've reached your limit?

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Lost My Way to the Theme Park

Once again, I remembered to write Theme Park too late at night on Sunday.

But now it's Tuesday. Let's just call yesterday unsuccessful. I was foggy, and barely convincing my body to cooperate for normal tasks, but I never got my brain started. I exercised, I drank coffee, and nothing. I suspect it was a sleep hangover - my body doesn't seem to know how to process a full 8 hours of sleep. I'm going to have to have a chat with it because I, like most people, am very fond of 8 hours of sleep.


Since beginning my weekly Theme Park posts, most of my frustration and dissapointment in our current residence has faded. I look at this as a positive thing. I know that we aren't here forever, and that our living here now will serve a greater purpose in our future. At least that is what I keep telling myself.

The past week has been spent running, reading, and cleaning. I ran 12 miles last week, which is not a lot for a serious runner. None-the-less, its a huge accomplishment for me.

Books I've read recently include:
- The Nonrunner's Marathon Guide for Women by Dawn Dias
- The Scarletti Curse by Christine Feehan
- Catch of the Day by Kristan Higgins
- Call of the Writer's Craft by Tom Bird (this is my current read-in-progress)

I've found myself on a roller coaster these days. I've felt incredibly inspired (unfortunately this inspiration hits around 11 pm) to run/exercise, write, be the perfect housewife all at the same time. Then I coax myself to sleep and when I wake up in the morning, the inspiration is gone. Being a night owl with 2 small kids who don't go to school is not an option. I battle moments of feverish motivation followed by days of complete dispair. I constantly feel as though I don't have time, don't have the talent/drive, and it's downright frustrating. Mustache Man is ever encouraging and supportive, and I thank God for him.

My figuative wall is all the criticism I recieved from my mother while I was growing up. How being a writer isn't a REAL job that will pay the bills, that I'm not good enough, and that I just need to marry a doctor/lawyer/Ichiro. I kid you not, she used to tell me that I should marry Ichiro. Money is a sign of success to the woman-who-gave-me-life. How do you get past your figurative road blocks?

Saturday, April 2, 2011

It's in the water, it's in the air! Baby fever and adoption

Baby fever seems to be going around.

I've been seeing many a Facebook post about this epidemic as of late, and have a confession of my own. I, too, was recently bitten by the baby fever bug. Never fear - Mustache Man and I anticipated this "sickness" and after the birth of our second child I had a tubal ligation. Fearing repercussions of my surgery might crop up later and cause marital discord, Mustache Man also underwent a vasectomy. We are a very sterile couple. I do believe I was made to have babies, my pregnancies were wonderful experiences and my labor/deliveries were "easy" in the realms of such occasions. My body seems to be a baby making machine. You can see why we had to put an end to such madness.

I desperately wanted both our children, and they are my greatest joys. But I also know where my personal limits are, and I want to live a life of adventure and give my children every possible opportunity available to them.

I am still open to expanding our family. Mustache Man and I have talked about the possibility of adopting since we started dating. It's an important decision, and not one that we take lightly. The other day I brought it to his attention that I may still want more children in the future, and his eyes nearly popped out with shock. I suppose he thought I might find our two to be too much work. They are a handful.

But I do know that we could offer someone a very good home full of love, later in life. (This would definitely not happen for a few more years at least and only if our family is ready for it as a whole.) I look forward to the possibilities.

I'm a big supporter of adoption. Obviously, our family is not in a place to do this just yet, but I plan on participating in this year's Adoption Run which will benefit Antioch Adoptions. The event will take place on June 11th, 2011 though they are still working out some kinks in registration. You can find more information about the run and Antioch Adoptions at Adoption Run. Donations can be made online for anyone who is interested. In 2010, they had 123 participants and raised $8533 dollars allowing one child to be adopted.

Please consider participating in the event or in donating towards this wonderful cause.